Wednesday, November 2, 2016

8 Little Habits That Will Instantly Make You Happier


8 Little Habits That Will Instantly Make You Happier


Ancient philosophers often counseled that the greatest journey begins with the smallest step.
“The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.” —Lao Tzu
 Make these small steps and define them as daily habits to find more happiness on your personal journey.
Early birds don’t need to get the worm; they get to work early, feel energized and complete the difficult tasks before noon. Studies show the ability to focus and be creative peaks between the hours of 8 and 10 a.m. So instead of burning the midnight oil and having to chug coffee all day just to keep your eyes open, get to bed at a reasonable hour to wake up early. At the end of the day, you’ll feel like you really accomplished something.
Curiosity hasn’t killed many cats, despite the saying. What kills is a lack of curiosity. If you’re not interested in what’s going on around you then it’s going to be hard to find motivation to meet your goals at work or home. Ask questions. Pay attention. Drop the slacker attitude and you’ll find that a true sense of wonder will appear in its place.
Respect is a two-way street. You give it and then you get it. Not only should you show others respect through common courtesy, but you should show respect to yourself by dressing modestly and neatly, paying attention to personal hygiene. A recent survey of college seniors showed that more respect was shown to those who were neatly dressed.
Stop carrying grudges. They weigh you down and take up too much mental space. Instead of daydreaming about things like laying on a beach soaking up rays, you burden yourself with thoughts of revenge against someone who probably doesn’t even remember what caused the grudge in the first place. Learn to forgive and you’ll sleep better. Then start planning that beach trip!
If it’s the right thing, do it. It’s called integrity. People who can’t make up their minds about the right and wrong of a situation wind up doing nothing. So, make up your mind, take a stand and stick to your guns. Happiness is not all about being loved by everyone all the time. It’s about being loved by a choice few because of your integrity.
Health is wealth. Take care of yourself. You might get a second chance at a lot of things, but you’ll never get a second body. If your body isn’t happy, then it will be much more difficult for your mind to stay happy, too.
7. Be confident, not arrogant.
Self-confidence is not the same as arrogance. Arrogant people often don’t listen to others and try to ramrod their way through life. Someone with self-confidence knows they are not perfect, but they also know they have at least the common sense to work out most everyday problems and challenges in a perfectly acceptable way. They accept the fact that sometimes you win and sometimes you lose, and go on with their lives. Arrogant people try to be perfect, and when they fail, their unhappiness can be epic.
Exercise that grin each morning and use it on someone who might need it—a co-worker, a family member, a stranger. Spread a little kindness to get a little happiness back.


Saturday, October 29, 2016

I Prepare to Die as the Taliban Attacks AUAF

I Prepare to Die as the Taliban Attacks AUAF


Wednesday 24th of August, 2016. The fourth day of my second semester. My last class finished at 6:20 p.m. I expected to meet a friend, but she did not come so I finished my dinner and went to the mosque to pray. At 7:04 p.m., I had just finished praying when three explosions went off two meters (6.5 feet) from the mosque. The air turned dark, the ceiling fell upon us. It was hard to breathe. Seconds later, gunshots began. I could not believe what seemed clear: the American University of Afghanistan was under attack.
After two minutes the firing stopped, and a small group of us girls fled the mosque bare-footed, running to Bayat building, the nearest building. We looked for a place to hide, but there was none. Then we heard shots from the second floor, and some girls began to shriek. The sounds of gunfire came from everywhere. We were trapped. I ran to the exit of the building, but before I could reach it, there was more shooting. This time I flattened myself to the ground and covered my ears tight, trying to prevent the sounds of violence from reaching my mind.
After 30 seconds I looked behind me. All the girls I’d been with were wounded. Then I saw a man holding a gun walking on the other side of the hall. “Alia. Now it is finished,” I told myself. “There is no way to escape.” I lay flat, listening for a long time to the horrifying sounds of the gunman firing at the students. The hall was in complete darkness. I tried to calm myself so that I would not shake. I could hear each step the man took. He was uniformed just like the university’s guards, but he was firing at students. It was a confusing sight.
For several hours I stayed in the same place. The Taliban had the keys for each room of the building. They opened one room after another and took students upstairs. They must have thought I was dead. I was very hopeful. I kept hoping the police would come save me, but after three hours I gave up and started to think about my last dreams.
I could hear the attackers singing songs. I was unable to stop myself from shaking in fear. Gunmen walked past us every ten minutes. It was around midnight when one of them started firing everywhere again. They were talking out loud. They were saying, “Where are all these police? Why don’t you come here and fight like a man?”
The nearer the bullets got to me, the more debris from the floor was hitting my legs. I suddenly couldn’t keep my legs still; I moved them, and the firing stopped. I heard laughter and knew they must have seen me; they would shoot me now. I said my last words and prepared to die. I waited and waited, but they did nothing. They did not shoot me.
Now the Taliban kept entering the room about every thirty minutes. Four boys who had pretended to be dead at first surrendered themselves, and the Taliban shot one of those boys. I told myself, “If I am supposed to die, why die alone? Why not surrender myself so that I die with my fellow students?”
At 1:30 a.m., I decided I would surrender. I would shout that I was alive. The Taliban was upstairs so I waited for them to return. Then the door in front of me opened and four men entered the hall. They were whispering.
I thought they were Taliban, so I said I was alive and wanted to surrender. They said, “Be quiet, we are police.” They took me out of the building. My feet hurt to walk. I felt shards of glass in them. I was taken to the nearest hospital. I was saved.
I still feel some kind of fear inside. The Taliban attacked the most prestigious university in Afghanistan, showing their opposition to education. But I know we students must find our bravery, stand beside AUAF, and tell the Taliban that AUAF is alive and will prevail, becoming even stronger.
Alia, age 16
This story has been published as part of our partnership with Women’s eNews Teen Voices series. Photo by US Embassy Kabul.

Tuesday, October 11, 2016

6 Essential Traits of Good Character


Rohn: 6 Essential Traits of Good Character - Copied

The following are what I believe to be the basics of good character. Miss one of these, and you’ll find a weak link in your character—one that might be your leadership’s undoing.
Integrity is a good catchword that is similar to character but provides us with a different way of looking at the ideas of character. The root of integrity means “whole” or “undivided,” and that’s a terrific way to help us understand what integrity is—an undivided life. For example, you don’t act one way in one situation and another in a different situation. There is integrity and wholeness to your life. Living this way will build trust in your followers. Another use of the word integrity that provides insight for us is when the word is used in regard to a physical structure. A wall or a building that is strong and has no cracks is said to have integrity. The same could be said for great leaders.
2. Honesty
It is regularly said that honesty is the best policy, but I would add that honesty is the only policy for great leaders. Think about it. Why do people hedge the truth? Usually for a few basic reasons: They are either afraid of the ramifications or they are trying to hide something. Either way, a lack of honesty results in the fact that you destroy the trust of those who follow you. Even if you tell them the truth but they know you have lied to others, it will destroy the trust you had with them. They find themselves thinking, “If he will lie to them, will he lie to me?”
I’ve never understood what people hope to accomplish by being dishonest. Eventually people come to know that you’re not honest in your dealings, and that is what you become known for. Your reputation is what your leadership is based on, though. When we’re honest and live transparently before our followers, they’re able to see us for who we are and make solid decisions to follow.
3. Loyalty
People of good character are loyal people. They have a “stick-to-it” attitude when it comes to others. Anybody who knows human nature knows that people fail. It’s just a matter of time, no matter how talented someone is. A person of good character stays with their friends even in the downtimes. Anyone can be friends with others when times are good. People of good character stay with their friends when they need them most. 5 how this translates into making you a good leader is this: People want to follow a leader who will stretch them beyond where they are now, but who’ll also allow them to try—and to fail. When we are loyal to our followers, they’ll be loyal to us and make every effort to succeed on our behalf and on behalf of the organization. There are few things that strengthen the leader-follower bond more than when a leader shows loyalty to a follower in need.
4. Self-Sacrifice
Lee Iacocca became a legend when he said he’d bring Chrysler back from the brink of bankruptcy and would take only a dollar a year in pay. This was a classic example of a leader sacrificing for the followers. It also showed his understanding of and empathizing with the average line worker. As a result, the workers of Chrysler rewarded him with an incredible following as they built Chrysler into one of the world’s leading car companies.
What is it about self-sacrifice that breeds followers? Followers don’t mind putting in the hard work. They don’t even mind a leader making more money or reaping benefits from their work. What followers do mind, though, is when the leader is using them for personal gain. People of good character don’t use other people, period. So when a leader shows sacrifice of personal gain, it says to the followers that they are willing to come alongside of them—and followers reward that almost universally. A person of good character shows that they can give up personal gain for the good of the whole.
5. Accountability
People of good character don’t mind accountability. In fact, they welcome it. This is the act of allowing others to have a say in your life, to speak to you straight about your life and conduct. The brutal truth is that we have blind spots and need other people to be in close to us so we can advance down the road of success. The need for accountability doesn’t prove lack of character. Rather, it proves the presence of character. G.K. Chesterton said, “Original sin is the only philosophy empirically validated by 3,500 years of human history.” The person of good character knows this and invites others to speak into their life.
Followers grow tired of leaders who will have nothing to do with accountability. They don’t mind leaders who make mistakes, but they do mind leaders who don’t take responsibility for their mistakes by being accountable. When we allow ourselves to be held accountable, our followers know that we are serious about keeping our own house in order, and thus will do a good job in leading the rest of the organization.
6. Self-Control
The ability to make decisions—good decisions—about what we will and will not do with our actions is at the core of what we become in regard to our character. There will be plenty of options to participate in things that are not moral. Everybody has temptations, but a person of good character knows to exercise self-control—literal control over their choices. When people don’t exercise self-control, they sabotage their ability to lead. People lose respect for them and will follow less, if at all. Self-control is the ability to choose to do the things we should, and to refrain from doing the things we shouldn’t. When we exhibit self-control, we again build trust in our followers. They respect us and want to follow us.